anchordruzyquote_mom_webThis is my mom. The happiest, healthiest, silliest, most talented artist, most loving nana to my girls, most beautiful light in my life. She passed away this February. Way way WAY too soon in my opinion, but not in God's opinion; her passing was perfectly timed in His eyes. Do you see that smile on her face as she was being baptized here? This was just months before she passed away. As she sat in that baptism pool, my sweet mom was so very scared, sad, and confused - held captive by a nasty disease called Early Onset Dementia. "Today I want to be baptized because I want the world to know that I believe in our Lord my God. Through him all things are possible. Whatever lies ahead for me only God knows. I know he will be with me every step of the way. Only God knows my full story." {Watch her entire baptism here.} When she raised from the water she smiled like she smiled before she got sick. A smile of hope and confidence and gratitude. A smile of FREEDOM washed over her face when she raised from the water. A pretty stinkin big smile was on my face, too, but tears streamed down my cheeks as a strange mixture of gratitude for this miracle, anger that someone so amazing would be tortured by disease, and fear of losing my best friend and biggest cheerleader tortured my mind. I knew that now, my mom and I would have eternity together, but the hurt and anger lingered in my heart. As I sat in church a few Sundays after she passed, still in complete shock, numb and desperate for some form of relief for my heart, our pastor read this verse.
"Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken." Psalm 62:6.
My good friend immediately looked at me. And I knew. That was it. That was the verse I needed to cling to - the verse that would carry me through the weeks, months, and years to come. As time passes, I see more light. I see more of His purpose. There is more laughter. But there is absolutely still a lot of tears. It's a simple verse - a verse that brings me back to basics when I can otherwise feel overwhelmed with how I am "supposed to" process grief. He is our rock. I will not be shaken. Despite the circumstances, my mom was not shaken. Inspired by her strength, I will not be shaken. Anchored to my Rock, I will gain strength and refuge. Anchored to my Rock, I will find stability and safety. Anchored to my Rock, I will not be shaken. I sat down a few minutes ago to tell you about this necklace - to tell you why it's one of my favorite designs. Because it's Small Business Saturday, I want you to see these designs for the heart behind them - so you can see that these are not mass manufactured by people that are simply going through the motions to make a paycheck. When you order a piece of Shine, you get a piece of my heart. You are helping to turn my hurt into healing and, I pray, that my healing leads to others' healing. Thank you for the opportunity to spread His light through Shine. XOXO, Hil